Even today, in 2020, girls still have a taboo attitude towards the topic of "sex"; whether it's talking about sex with men or masturbating, they have unspeakable emotions.
01. Those things about sex toys.
Question: Hello Teacher S, I have been troubled by a question recently. I ca n’t figure it out, so I took the liberty to ask you. I should belong to that kind of precocious girl. I discovered the secret of my body when I was a teenager. I learned masturbation when I was in junior high school.
I would come (masturbation) once a few days at that time. I vaguely felt that this was not good, so I never told others, including my parents.
Later when I grew up, I learned some human physiology courses and knew what was going on, but I was still very nervous and blind, so I also specifically looked for some related papers. After knowing that Lagerstroemia indica is normal human needs, I feel relieved; at this time, I will also find some more desirable films for myself, so every time Ziwei feels very happy.
Later I went to college and talked about this when I was chatting with my roommates. They thought that masturbation was not something serious girls did. I was afraid that they would not be excluded or discriminated against, so I nodded and said yes.
After that chat, every time I pleased myself, I was careful not to be found by my roommates.
Later I graduated from college. I was happiest when I started working. I rented a house and bought a lot of sex toys.
Later, I made a boyfriend, got together for half a year, and went to bed or something. Sex life was very harmonious. Some time ago, the house he rented expired, because I rented a house, so he came directly to live with me.
When we packed the house together last weekend, he found my sex toys and became furious.
He said that I did not love myself, that serious girls did not use sex toys, and also said that I was dissatisfied with this, and I would definitely be derailed after getting married. The two of us quarreled over this matter. I cried so much that he didn't come to coax me.
Teacher S, what should I do? Do girls really love themselves with sex toys?
Answer: Hello. Let me answer your last question first: girls who use sex toys are not unselfish.
On the contrary, you are very calm and frank, and you know more about respecting and caring for your own body. The definition of self-love is that in addition to knowing to protect yourself, you also know how to love yourself.
One thing, if you feel right, then you should do it firmly. When a reasonable desire comes, you don't hide it or suppress it. Instead, you respect your heart and obey your normal desires. I think this is a very good thing! Many girls should learn from you.
Because it is this social environment that is not friendly to girls. From ancient times to the present, conservative and prejudiced thinking has made women have to be implicit in sex and not take the initiative. Be a little more proactive and be criticized as slutty and unselfish.
Under such circumstances, women have become ashamed to talk about sex and to express their normal and reasonable desires. In fact, this is against humanity. So many people think that women are "born without sex".
Regarding the use of sex toys, I dare not share it with my girlfriend, let alone with other people. Sex must not be shameful.
Being born, having "sex" and enjoying "sex" is the right that life gives us. What we have to do is learn to cherish ourselves and love ourselves.
Without prejudice to them, formalizing the desires of your own body is not only not to be discriminated against, but to be respected, because you have done things that many people dare not do! Therefore, you should not have too much psychological pressure. As for your boyfriend, you can enlighten him and tell him that this is a question of his ideas, and he needs to change his traditional and paranoid idea; or you can share this article directly with him.
If he still can't accept it, then I suggest you separate it. Because when two people are together, the most important thing is that the three perspectives are the same.
From the current point of view, he obviously thinks that girls are the type of people without sexual desire, but he is having a relationship with you. In his heart, there is a high probability that he would be happy for everyone! Secondly, he doesn't respect women, let alone you.
He can say that he doesn't understand the use of sex toys by girls, but always have respect and trust for his girlfriend? But he directly said that you did not love yourself, and also blindly determined that you would be derailed in the future, which I think is an insult to you. So, if he can't change his mind, then I suggest separating.
Because of different sexual concepts, more similar contradictions will arise in the future.
02. Why choose a toy with a partner?
Question: Hello Mr. S, I have been reading articles on the Internet recently about how to use sex toys. I just want to ask, are n’t sex toys used by single people? Why do you use sex toys with a partner?
Answer: Do n’t you eat snacks if you have a staple food? Of course, I will. By the same token, wouldn't you use sex toys with a partner? This is very easy to understand!
For ordinary people, the honeymoon period for two people may be the first one or two years; over time, the passion between the two people tends to be dull, from several times a day at the beginning to one time a week, once a month, what's more, they only come once every New Year.
What caused two people to look like this? Has the relationship changed?
Do not! It's not that the feelings are gone, but that the freshness is gone! The excitement is gone! When facing a partner, just like facing your left and right hands, it feels like a finger. How can you still talk about sexual interest? How could it be fresh!
Using sex toys is different.
Toys with different functions can bring different sexual experiences. This difference can not only bring unknown freshness to two people but also help them unlock sensitive points on their bodies.
Because of the physical differences between boys and girls, it may cause the two men to have different orgasms during sex. Studies have shown that 90% of girls in sex will pretend to reach orgasm. Therefore, when having sex, use sex toys to perform foreplay first, which can better take care of the physiological needs of both parties.
03. Need to know before choosing sex toys?
Question: Hello Teacher S, I am new to sex toys and want to start one, but I do n’t know how to choose one? I want to ask what should be paid attention to when choosing sex toys?
A: Many brands are now starting to be high-end, high-end, low-key, sweet, and luxurious, so many of the toys are still very exquisite in appearance and design, and girls can also choose with all their hearts.
There are many sex toys on the market, and the design of the appearance and image is really exquisite and beautiful! I see that even if I do n’t use it, I want to buy one for collection at home! But it does n’t mean that it is easy to use, or that it is not suitable for you.
For example, some small animal-shaped toys are not suitable for novices because the overall size is too large. Forcible use will only hurt or hurt, and it will also bring a nightmare experience. Therefore, this type of toy may require a little experience People use.
Some girls have a fear of vaginal toys. At this time, they should start with non-vaginal toys.
Before you start to buy toys, you need to understand the physiological structure and acceptance of your body as much as possible. For example, can you accept the body? Is it functionally acceptable for functions other than vibration? What size is acceptable in size? What features do you want to experience? Wait for some similar questions; in this way, the toys selected in combination with their own acceptance can really make themselves happy!
Conclusion: Finally, Teacher S wants to say: "Sex education" is really important. This is not only a field for girls to try, but it is also a concept that boys also need to accept and learn. Understanding yourself and pleasing yourself is one of the things that girls need to pay attention to now.
Because only by looking at "sex" as a common knowledge can girls learn to face their desires and boys learn to respect women's rights.
